You Might Be A Scrooge

YOU MIGHT BE A SCROOGE IF…

You turn on the lawn sprinklers on Christmas Eve
to keep carolers away;

You get your Christmas tree at a rest stop at night;

Your idea of holiday decorations is a rotten pumpkin;

Your favorite Christmas pastime is putting defective bulbs
in your neighbor’s string of Christmas lights;

Your favorite Christmas drink is rotten Egg Nog;

Your favorite Christmas song is
“Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer;”

Your idea of a staff or company Christmas party is
“O, just forget it;”

You like snow only because you know it will mean
there will be some cool car accidents;

Your favorite Christmas snack is one-year old fruitcake;

You don’t like the ending to “It’s a Wonderful Life,” “Miracle on 31st Street,” “The Grinch,” and “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”

You put a laxative in Santa’s cookies,
knowing and laughing about the outcome;

And finally, if your three favorite words are
“Ba Hum Bug”